Rough day today I think

I'm at work doing this from my phone so forgive any typos...

I just feel like crying and I don't know why, I hate these days, they sneak up on you with no warning.  It's a feeling of it's never going to happen, that I'll forever be the one to help others get their dream but I'm stuck at the starting line.

I guess I'm the ultimate coach.  I don't want to be a coach anymore, I want my turn of having MY hand held and helping ME.

A good internet friend of mine who has suffered many losses found out she was pregnant a few days ago, it truly was like a miracle for her, she has a few issues of hormones that make it hard for her to get and sustain a pg.  Well yesterday her hcg levels started dropping, so she's losing yet another babe. The unfairness(yes life isn't fair but fuck off with that bullshit)of it boggles me.  A couple who is loving, stable, and so ready get thei hope snatched away, while Susie Blowjob downtown tries to sell her baby for more smack.

I used to believe with everything in me in gaurdian angels, I've realized that in the last year there's no such thing.

Anyways, I'm at work, having a rough day, gotta get through it just like everyother day......